By Wolfgang Puck, chef, restaurateur

"I learned more from the one restaurant that didn't work than from all the ones that were successes."

The UNDECIDED VOTER!

THIS IS AN IL-19 JOKE THAT CAN BE ENJOYED BY BOTH PARTIES!

While walking down the street one day an UNDECIDED VOTER is tragically
hit by a truck and dies.

His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance.
"Welcome to heaven," says St. Peter.

"Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see an UNDECIDED VOTER around these parts, you see, so we're not sure what to do with you."

"No problem, just let me in," says the man.

"Well, I'd like to, but I have orders from higher up. What we'll do is have you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can choose where to spend eternity."

"Really, I've made up my mind. I want to be in heaven," says the
UNDECIDED VOTER.

"I'm sorry, but we have our rules."

And with that, St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes
down, down,down to hell. The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a green golf course. In the distance is a clubhouse and standing in front of it are all his Republican friends and other UNDECIDED VOTERS who had worked with him.

Everyone is very happy and in evening dress. They run to greet
him, shake his hand, and reminisce about the good times they had.

They play a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster,
caviar and champagne.

Also present is John Shimkus, who really is a very friendly guy who
has a good time dancing and telling jokes. They are having such a good time that before he realizes it, it is time to go.

Everyone gives him a hearty farewell and waves while the elevator
rises...

The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens on heaven where
St. Peter is waiting for him.

"Now it's time to visit heaven."

So, 24 hours pass with the UNDECIDED VOTER joining a group of contented
souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a good time and, before he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by and St. Peter returns.

"Well, then, you've spent a day in hell and another in heaven.
Now choose your eternity."

The UNDECIDED VOTER reflects for a minute, then he answers: "Well, I
would never have said it before, I mean heaven has been delightful, but I think I would be better off in hell."

So St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down,
down to hell.

Now the doors of the elevator open and he's in the middle of a
barren land covered with waste and garbage.

He sees all his friends, dressed in rags, picking up the trash
and putting it in black bags as more trash falls from above.

The John Shimkus comes over to him and puts his arm around his shoulder.

"I don't understand," stammers the UNDECIDED VOTER. "Yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and clubhouse, and we ate lobster and caviar, drank champagne, and danced and had a great time. Now there's just a wasteland full of garbage and my friends look miserable. What happened?"

Shimkus looks at him, smiles and says, "Yesterday we were
campaigning......

Today you voted."

Remember once you vote, Shimkus will forget about you.

Vote Stover for Congress! Honest, Friendly and he doesn’t forget.

Ron
www.WeDemocrats.com
www.uslinx.com

By Francis Bacon, Writer, Statesman

"In civil business, what first? Boldness. What's second and third? Boldness."

Chris Lytle Sales Tip: "The juggler can't tell you which ball is more important. Drop just one and the show is over." I was particularly intrigued by this thought from Joan Magretta's book, What Management Is. In selling you have to have a lot of balls in the air because some will drop. But the show is not over. You simply add another prospect and keep on going. Here is my twist on Magretta's thought:

The salesperson can't tell you which prospect is more important. Small-looking customers can grow at a phenomenal pace and Fortune 500 companies can fall off the stock exchange. Keep juggling.

John Shimkus on Lobbyists

by: EricV

Thu Feb 16, 2006 at 11:18:43 AM CST

It seems that Sen. Jim Talent (R-Mo) is getting some heat for having a lobbyist as his campaign treasurer. Well, the St. Louis Post-Dispatch looked around its readership area and found another lawmaker with a similar problem: John Shimkus.

It seems that the treasurer of Shimkus' campaign PAC, Mark Valente III, also "lobbies for a gamut of interests, including the North American Coal Corp." Shimkus didn't find anything wrong in this saying:

Shimkus also dismisses suggestions that lobbyist-campaign connections are improper. Valente never lobbied him after he became his PAC treasurer, Shimkus said. "I couldn't even tell you who he represents," he said.
...
Shimkus conceded that Valente's role as treasurer for him and other lawmakers "probably" gives him cachet with clients, who understand that it means he has a financial connection to those who hold power. "That's Washington," Shimkus said.

In case you need someone to remind you that all is not normal with this situation, the Post-Dispatch reminds us of why this sort of thing happens (and why it is now (finally) looked down upon).

Indeed, there's little question that lawmakers are likely to return a lobbyist's call more quickly if that lobbyist also volunteers for their campaigns and helps bring in campaign cash. And there's little doubt that lobbyists use their "treasurer" or other campaign titles in pitches to clients, as proof that they are wired in with Washington's power players.

Just one more reason to send John Shimkus packing.

Danny Stover is running for the Democratic nomination to challenge Shimkus in November. Get to know his positions on the issues and consider donating or volunteering.

You can reach Danny at his website:

www.stoverforcongress.us

through his email: dlstover@stoverforcongress.us

And his address is:

Danny L. Stover
Post Office Box 1945,
Centralia, Illinois 62801-9127

Ron
www.WeDemocrats.com
www.uslinx.com